I have worried since my childhood and it is largely contributed by my conditioning. I have worried about my academic performance at different levels due to fear of failing, I have worried about sickness because all I could imagine was death which was scary, I have worried about school fees yet I was not in position to look for it, I have worried when competing due to fear of losing and criticism from fans, I have worried about what people think about me, I have worried about my parents, I have worried about my siblings, I have worried about marriage, I have worried about my relationship with friends, I have worried about the future, I have worried about my government sustainability and employment. I have worried about unemployment, I have worried about creating a business, I have worried about posting anything on social media, I have worried about money, I have worried about God’s opinion over my life, I have worried about failing, I have worried about people making wrong decision in life, I have worried about God’s purpose over my life. The only thing that I did not worry about was food because it was more than enough. I have experienced worry in almost everything in my life. I read a bible verse that said worry about nothing and ask God for what you need. It did not make sense to me because it required believing than knowing. I couldn’t get any help because I was not strong enough to share my worries with anybody and I thought I will manage it. So, I completely shut me in and launched this internal war between me and worry. Worry created fear in me and fear made me hesitate in making new friends and persuading things I really desired. It made me fear approaching people who could be of great influence in my life. It made me fear approaching ladies but on the positive side it helped me avoid unnecessary baby mama’s and don’t ask me how I met my wife. Worry instilled fear in me that closed doors that would have led to my destiny faster. I have learnt that there is much more on the other side of worry and fear if I successful embrace it, know and understand the root of it, my true nature and my relationship with it. How does this come about, by taking a journey into you, to learn you, which demands energy, curiosity and attention to you and to confront you, unmasking the large silent part of you that is only known to you. The words know thyself carved above the entrance to the temple of Apollo at Delphi, Greece indicates that knowing and understanding our self-knowledge is not only the means by which lasting peace and happiness may be found within an individual but also the basis for peace among individuals, communities and nations.
The mind is like a battle field where different kind of battles are fought before they actualize. We have good and bad battles which are sometimes tough or easy to handle. Some of these battles in our minds have caused stress, depression and even death to our loved ones. We have won some battles and lost some. This happens when we make any decision that our lives depend upon and sometimes, we are stuck in some situations not knowing which is the best move or step to take. At this point, the mind starts battling on what to do and sometimes we end up picking a wrong decision, thinking it is the right decision, or picking the right decision thinking it is a wrong decision. I have faced many of these battles in my mind and sometimes I have felt like we are two people within me. Severally, I have asked myself who is this other person within me, challenging me on decisions I make that seem clearly right! Who is this person bargaining with me within me! I have had pull and push with this person within me and we have had several conversations when making serious decisions about my life. I have severally felt like getting hold of this person and have a serious eye to eye conversation to at least have a common ground or be on the same page when handling situation in my life.
All this battles happen in the mind, battle on employment and unemployment, battle on best the career to pursue, battle on starting a business or not, battles on taking a loan or not, battle on buying resources we desire or save money, battle on choosing the right spouse and where to find them, battles of going to church or not, battles to party or not, battles on to have sex or not before marriage, battles on doubts, battles on drinking alcohol and smoking, battle on getting saved or not, battle on which church or religion is the best to follow, battles on truth about life and life purpose, battle on divorcing or not, battle on which is the right decision, battle on giving or taking bribes, battle on true and fake friends, battle on injustice, battle on who is the right leader to vote for, battle on euthanasia. The list is long. The question is, what is your mind battle? Are you aware of your own battles? How do you deal with your own battles?
www.knowyourselfcentre.org
